(This entry is a lengthy one and you might be bored with it - so, you can decide before your read) :)
I've been feeling slightly unhealthy lately, and I seriously don't know what's wrong with my body. It seems that it can't resist all the unhealthy food I've been consuming - I don't blame the hormone (or maybe a little bit). The fact that a lot of things are going on on my mind, I tend to opt for unhealthy snacks and heavy meal in the evening. Like my body says no but mind says something else (like yes, eat more perhaps?) :p.
I have restricted my food soon after my last exam paper. That's the most appropriate time for me to keep track on what I've been eating. Like, 2 wholemeal bread with tuna for breakfast and one heavy lunch (either salmon/chicken breast) and very light dinner or just fruits for dinner. But that only lasted for 2 weeks. A soon as I need to accept the fact that I'll be back for good and what I might venture in a few weeks time, I worried so much and end up eating a lot. It's been so hard actually to restrict my food during my studies. In fact I think most of the ladies felt the same way, right? You have the reason to eat unhealthily - simply it's because you are a student. Nothing else..
So, that's just one of the things that have been bothering me quite a lot these few days. I'm not worried that my family will greet me with something like "kakak dah berisi sikit lah" or "kak aida nampak lain lah" - hell yeah "lain" tu means gemuk because my family tend not to judge each other. It's me that always have this uncomfortable feeling. Okay, maybe I'm a bit unreasonable here :p. Maybe bukan gemuk, tapi I ni makin berisi. Atas kecik, bawah besar. Hahaa, now you can laugh..
Ben & Jerry's ice-cream, kebab wrap, pizza late at night, pastries on the go and my all time favourite, sugary cereals (Crunchy Nut Cluster Choc) which I take not just for breakfast, but occasionally during the nights (okay tipu, bukan ocassionally tapi selalu!). Darn...I don't fancy rice tho, that's a good thing..
The thing about me is that my weight have always maintained these past few weeks (in fact almost 9 months now), but I can feel the change to my body (the outer part). Wobbly there and there, and everything seems have grown bigger..Even my small fingers seems to have outgrown since I don't know when..Hahaha! Last year I managed to shed 5kgs, but that took 9 months with healthy eating plan and exercises. Ask my friends, they now how freak I was with food and calories counts. When they eat, I'll go next to them a scared them on how much are they eating in just one "ngap" :p
Let's just check what I've been eating today for example:
9am - 2 pcs of bread with a replacement for butter (forgot the name) with a little bit of sugar (see with sugar in the morning) and 1 mug of camomile tea.
11am - 2 pcs of bread with tuna salad filling with 1 slice of cheese (alan made this for me).
1pm - Quarter a tub of Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough ice-cream (slurppp).
3pm - 1 small bowl of Crunchy Nut Cluster Choc cereal with semi-skimmed milk (that's healthy a bit)
5pm - 2 mugs of water
6pm - 2 plates of chicken rice with a huge portion of chicken.
9pm - 1 mug of camomile tea (didn't eat much actually tonight compared to yesterday).
Gulp, am I this unhealthy all this while? *gulp*gulp*
I know I should do something. I can imagine what will it be like when I'm back for good in 10 days time. Grandma with her yummylicious asam pedas Melaka, busu with her sambal udang, mum with her puteri rendam..Urgh! Hate myself now..
What should I do :(
p/s: HAPPY SUNDAY LADIES. GO OUT SHOPPING, BUT DON'T EAT TOO MUCH LIKE ME! :p